Welcome to Facebook

“WELCOME TO FACEBOOK... The place where people add you as a friend & walk past you in the street. Where relationships are perfect, affairs are started, & liars believe they are telling the truth. Your enemies visit your profile the most, yet your friends & family block you, & even though you write what you are really thinking, someone always takes it the wrong way, & people think your status is about them...lol Repost if you agree!!”

I lifted this comment from a Facebook page because when I read it; at first, I thought it was funny. But after I thought about it, I realised it was poignant and I felt compelled to explore it more. Has our society become so impersonal that this comment is actually true?

Are we more likely to open up when we are able to hide behind a faceless “social network” such as Facebook? Isn’t just the term “social network” something of a misnomer? Didn’t socialising used to mean that we actually went out and met people face to face, looked them in the eyes to determine whether they were trustworthy or not. But now we are forming relationships with people based on what they write on their Facebook pages. Pages that can be forwarded from one person to the next without the knowledge of the original author. Pages that contain more poetic license than truth. Pages that are meant to look glamorous and perfect.

Let’s take the first line, “The place where people add you as a friend and walk past you in the street.” What does this statement really mean – that people can only be brave and full of themselves when they are hiding behind the avatar or the image they create on Facebook. Sometimes when I read the comments posted, I am surprised by the content. Sometimes I am amazed by the lives some people are leading – so beautiful and flawless and carefree that it makes me think I’ m missing out on the finer things in life as I’m sure it does to many others. Are we becoming so antisocial because of this so called social networking community because it encourages many to create fictitious identities so their lives can be as exciting as their “friends”?

“Where relationships are perfect” – if anyone has been in a long-term relationship we all know they are far from perfect and neither are they meant to be. Relationships are meant to challenge us to be the best people possible – to force us to dig beneath the surface and come face to face with our inner most selves. They are not meant to show that we are perfect because we are not. Could this social network be one of the primary causes for relationships being destroyed so quickly because people expect relationships to be like the perfect fantasy they create through their Facebook lives?

“Affairs are started”- I have to admit this one stumps me because how can an affair be started in such a public forum? Everyone reads what everyone is posting so everyone knows what everyone else is doing so if anyone is fool enough to start an affair on Facebook in my opinion they must be looking to get caught!

“Liars believe they are telling the truth” – again this goes back to the whole false world and images that people are projecting on Facebook.  Sometimes when I look at some of the photos that are posted I am amazed by how perfect they look but we all know that photographs just capture the moment. They are not ongoing and don’t show what happens before or after the photo is taken and this is what Facebook captures – a moment. It is not ongoing. It’s not for real.

“Your enemies visit your profile the most, yet your friends and family block you”– why do they want to do this and if we know this to be true why would anyone post their most intimate details? And didn’t our mothers always tell us to keep our enemies close? So why lock anyone out from your Facebook page when it will make them that much more determined to find a way in because then they will believe you are trying to hide something. 

“Even though you write what you are really thinking, someone always takes it the wrong way”, welcome to the world of writing. Writing is a very personal thing and is always open to interpretation by whoever is reading it. Writers, as I well know, are often writing from their perspective and can only write their innermost thoughts without realising by doing so they often expose something about those who are the closest to them. Writing is meant to draw readers in to make them believe that the author is writing about them. Consequently when someone reads something, it may trigger something inside them – something they were not even aware they were experiencing until they read what was written. And at the end of the day, writing is like walking down the street naked – you are out there bare and exposed so you have to have thick skin if you want to write. Facebook has only just brought this fact to the forefront because now everyone who has a Facebook page is a writer and has opened themselves up to be admired, attacked or vilified so be careful of what you post because it can come back to haunt you.

Believe me I know and it’s not always the response you crave. The written word is forever. Is your Facebook page something you will be proud of when you’re older?  I have nothing against Facebook. I truly believe it is great for reconnecting friends and for discovering what’s new.  It’s a great forum when it is used correctly. Remember that always.