Feeling restless today

I am feeling restless today. Ill at ease and I don’t know why.

I feel as if there is something in the air but I can’t put my finger on what it is.

It could be because I am trying so hard to figure out what comes next for me and every once in a while I feel out of control, not knowing where to turn or who to turn to. Today is one of those days.

I am a resilient person who has confronted many obstacles and made it through them all so I know this massive elephant in the room will soon pass. But today it just seems so much larger than other days. I guess I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed because I feel like the world is on my shoulders. Why? I don’t know. I wish I did so I could shake this feeling of unrest.

My whole being is exhausted mentally and physically so much so that even my eyes feel like they are too heavy for me. Perhaps what I am meant to do today is replenish myself. Give myself a break and see what comes to me in my stillness. Even the air outside is still. The birds are not calling out as much as they usually do.  Is there something amiss?

Everything I told myself I was going to do today I don’t seem to have the energy or wherewithal to do any of them. I’ m not feeling particularly creative. Just pensive. 

So I’m going to give myself permission to take the time to contemplate, to go to my quiet place and listen to my inner voice to hear what it is trying to tell me. And this time I will really listen.

Writing this blog has helped me to release some of the frustration and tension that I am experiencing but I still feel like I am stuck in the Waiting Room as Dr. Seuss calls it – waiting for this to happen and for that to happen. Just waiting.

Is that it- am I meant to learn patience? Am I meant to learn that sometimes I have to just be still and open myself to the Universe? Am I meant to see that this holding pattern or waiting room is allowing me to embrace my exhaustion?  Giving me permission to give in to it. Yes I think it is because the heaviness is starting to lift as I have just made an appointment to have Reiki done so that is my answer. Take time for me today.  I’ll let you know the outcome tomorrow.