Fear creates all kinds of negative energy within us. Often
manifesting the very outcome we most fear. The very outcome we do not want to
happen.
Fear opens us up to all the fear so prevalent in our world
today. Limiting our beliefs and our choices because it forces us to stay within
the confines of our limited three dimensional physical being. Rather than
accepting that we are much more than our physical. Much more than the limited
experiences we may have as individuals.
Fear is a conscious choice to stay in the darkness and to
breed more negativity. And it is so tempting to remain in a state of fear
because we are often validated when we come from a place of being a victim than
when we come from a place of owning our shortcomings and acknowledging our greatness.
Last night I was so angry with certain events that have been
occurring in my life that I snapped and let out such rage that I felt like the
little girl from the Exorcist. I was surprised my head did not start spinning as
hers did. But I noticed when I filled with such rage, my whole body became
stiff and brittle. My insides felt like they were going to burn up and I found
I was grinding my teeth. My whole body
was rigid with fear I realized. And it did not feel good in anyway.
So why do we get angry? Why do we allow ourselves to become
mired in so much fear? How does it happen and more importantly how do we get
ourselves out of such states? Last night after looking at myself from the outside
in. After seeing the concern on the faces of my children, I knew I had to step
back and ask myself what was truly the cause of my anger. And the only answer that came to me was fear.
Fear that I am never going to please certain people in my
life. Fear of where my life is going. Fear of not fulfilling my dreams. Fear of
absorbing some of the negative energy that is swirling around me. Fear of fear.
And it was only this morning when I woke up that I was able to reach this conclusion.
To understand because I was not centered last night. Because I allowed the negative
energy of certain people to flow into me, I became exactly what I did not want.
Exactly what I was trying to resist. I became exactly what I thought I was
better than because I had judged, condemned and by doing so became the mirror
of what I was resisting.
So this morning after doing the Chopra meditation, I have
decided to do my best to breathe through my judgment of others. To breathe
through any comments that come from them. To breathe through my fears and just
make the conscious choice to be where I am as I am for that moment. To not project
into the future. To not dwell in the past. To try to find forgiveness, empathy
and love in my heart even when I feel like there is nothing left.
There is no one outside of me who can control my emotions
unless I allow them. Last night I made the choice to join with the negative
rather than consciously choosing to remove myself from it. I forgive myself for
doing so recognizing that the choice I made was an invaluable lesson to me.
Allowing me to recognise my actions are controlled by the choices I make.
Conscious choice is always available to me especially during those times when I
feel like I have no choices.
By asking myself in my darkest hour, will this choice bring
fulfillment and happiness to me and to those affected by my choice. To step
back from the situation I find myself in. To take the time to breathe through
it. To make choices made with full awareness rather than from a place of fear.
Thank you Deepak Chopra for helping me to know when my
choices are made from the heart and with intention, they will be the best
choice for me. And even when I make a bad choice, I can always shift the
outcome by consciously making a different choice.
Today I make great choices because they are made with full awareness.
Not from fear. Not from expectation. Not from judgment. But from full
awareness. Namaste
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