Sometimes what we need is right in front of us

I can't believe how much of a lesson I learnt night before last. It has been bothering me ever since so I decided to blog about it with the intention of remembering this lesson particularly since it came from my children.

The other night I went into the kitchen and there was a trail of where my children had been. Tape on the buffet table. Scissors on the bench. Sewing kit on the kitchen counter. Glitter glue on the Island. Paper on the dining room table. And instantly I got angry because I have been trying so hard to teach my children to clean up after themselves.

My daughter is the messiest of my children and she is the most artistic so I assumed it was her once again leaving a mess through the house. I yelled at her, "Why didn't you clean up after yourself?"

She looked at me with a hurt look and said, "But it wasn't even me. I didn't do anything." After she said that and seeing her expression I felt really bad.

"Oh it was me," my son said. "Sorry forgot to clean up."

They were busy making birthday cards for my husband and their dad so I left them to it. My son on his computer collating family pictures making a collage of memories and putting our family clan on the back. My daughter on the floor with glitter pens, crayons and paper making her card. I walked out of my son’s room feeling like the worst mother in the world.

After we read our story, I asked them where the cards were and they both said, "We'll show you." They were both so excited it was priceless. They led me to the entrance hall and said, "See."

I looked up and on the arch of the entrance hall, they had hung a banner they had made that said, "Happy Birthday Papa".  They wanted him to feel special when he got home from his trip even though it was not his birthday. They felt bad that they were going to be out for sleepovers so they wanted to make sure he knew they were thinking about him and that's why they had put the extra effort in to make his birthday special. On the banner they had strung their cards up so they could pull them down for his birthday when they got home. And that explained why they had created the mess.

I had walked under that arch several times and never even saw the banner they had made, I was so focused on their mess that I didn't even see the masterpiece they had created. And once I saw it, I hugged them and told them how proud I was of them for being so creative, ingenious and thoughtful. They were so proud of themselves. The mess they had made paled into insignificance once I saw what they had accomplished, totally unprompted and from their hearts.

After they went to bed, I walked back out into the entrance. I stood and looked at the banner for a long time. My heart swelling with pride. And realised my children were teaching me an invaluable lesson. They were letting me know sometimes what we need is right in front of our faces but we are so busy trying to find it that we don't even see it until someone points it out to us. And then our eyes open wide and our souls even more when we see what we need has been there for us waiting for us to really see it.

And what’s funny is once I knew the banner was there, that's all I could see after that.  I couldn't believe I hadn't seen it before. But I guess the other part of the lesson was I wasn't meant to see it until they could present it to me, allowing me to take in their enthusiasm and pride and getting the full picture of what it meant to them. Taking me to the second part of the lesson, sometimes we don't and can't see what we need until we are ready.  Here's to my children being my teachers yet again. And my gratitude for recognising them as my teachers.