God only gives us what we can bear Shakira Hunt

I had already written my blog for today when I came across a heartfelt plea from my great niece Shakira Hunt asking for support in her uphill battle to complete University. And after I read it with heavy heart I thought I had to write something just for her. And in doing so realised I was not just writing for her but for all of us that face our darkest days. For all of us who struggle from time to time and see no point in continuing.

Because what I realise as I age and as I look back over the times when I wanted to give up and sometimes did. When I saw no point in continuing and sometimes did. Every single one of those times that I let go of my dream, a short while later someone else did what I let go off. And then I would be frustrated, angry and feel like the world was against me by giving someone else my dream. But you know what the world did nothing. It was I who surrendered my dream to someone else.

No one else can take our dream away from us. Nothing else can take our dreams away from us. The only one who can ever take our dream from us is us. We are the only ones to blame for getting within reach of the finish line but giving up blaming everyone and everything else for our shortcomings. No one or nothing else has the power over us until we surrender our power to them.

Hard as it may seem and as cruel as it may seem, everything that happens in our lives happens for us not to us. I remember a time when I was about my great niece’s age many years ago, I felt like my burden was too heavy to bear. Everything I touched seemed to turn sour. Everywhere I turned doors were slamming in my face. I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cease to exist. Thinking at least then life would not matter because mine would be over.

And during that time I called upon one of my favourite teachers. Crying.  And bearing my soul to her. A woman I had not spoken to in years but a woman who was in my life at around the time I lost my mother and I remembered how much better she made me feel. How much she validated me during my time of trial so I called out to her and she answered without question, without judgement and she told me, “God only gives us what we can bear.”

“How much more can I bear?” I answered.

“Only you and God know that. And when your trials are done, you will look back on this period and see why you had to experience what you did.”

At the time I was not satisfied with her explanation. But as I age and as I face trial upon trial and doors that slam in my face. As I watch dreams slip out of my hands into the hands of others, I realise that if I want to live my life, I truly have to live it even in those days when there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel. I know everything that is happening in my life is what I have invited into it and if I don’t like it or want it, it is up to me to change my reaction to it by either accepting it for what it is and working through it or walking away and letting it go.

So to my beautiful great niece who is feeling like her burdens are too heavy to carry, what you have to decide is whether the burdens you are carrying are truly yours and if they are then you need to go for it no matter what. And if they are everyone else’s burdens then you need to surrender them back to them so you can carry your own.

Life always give us what we need. Not what we want. Good luck with your trials and your burdens. Remember if it is your dream and your dream alone, don’t let it slip through your hands into the hands of someone else. Namaste my beautiful and strong niece, you are nearing the finish line and I’ll be there along with all those who are supporting you waiting for you to cross the line with pride and joy.