Life is but a moment

Life is but a moment. A message I received from Tyler Perry this morning. And though I know it was not a personal message, it felt that way to me because his message was meant for me to hear. Short and sweet and drew me in because like him, I am a motherless child. And his message was speaking about the short life his mother lived more in image than in words. But it resonated with me.

Then I opened another message from Brave Girls Club and it said, You have a message. You have a mission. You have a purpose one that is unique to you – one that no one else can live out but you - don’t forget to share it. And what I heard and read was don’t forget to live it. Shaking me out of the pits of darkness.

I needed these messages this morning so I know my angels and guides heard my plea for help. My cry for balance. My desire to release the pent up emotions welling up inside me that were threatening to pull me under. Keep me in that place of darkness that serves no one but darkness itself.

Last night I went to bed harboring resentment. Resentment for the way certain things in my life are unfolding. Resentment because I feel like I am losing my purpose. Losing my voice and giving so much of myself away so that everyone else can find their way. So that everyone else can be happy. So that everyone can be at peace with their demons. And sometimes I feel like I am being taken advantage of. Sometimes I feel no matter how much I give, it is never enough or when I feel like my time for giving is up, someone or something else creeps in demanding more from me. And because I am a giving person, I sometimes give until I feel depleted. At least this was the story I was telling myself over and over again. Taking me down into a pit of feeling sorry for myself. Feeling like I am drowning while everyone else is swimming, winning and achieving their dreams while my dream seems to be floating off in the distance.

I woke up this morning still filled with resentment. Until I read those posts, those posts that were delivered just for me to see. Tyler Perry reminding me that life is but a moment. A blink in the grand scheme of things. Over before we know it. Before we think it has begun because we are too busy living other people’s lives that we forget to live our own. So busy being what other people want us to be that we forget who we are. So busy giving to others that we forget to give to ourselves.

And then Brave Girls Club reminded me that I have a message. I have a mission. I have a purpose unique to me on this Earth while I am alive in this physical form. Reminding me I asked to come here to do something and until I am brave enough to use my voice, to stand up for who I am, to not give until I am depleted, then I will carry resentment with me always. And it will grow and spread like a cancer until it ravages me and leaves me believing I am a victim rather than the victor I am capable of being.

Because life is but a moment and it is up to me to capture that moment so I can be my message, live out my mission and own my purpose. No one else can do that for me or take it away from me unless I give them permission. Unless I invite them in. Unless I give all of me away before giving to myself. So I am surrendering resentment back to where it belongs and breathing in possibility and faith and hope.  Opening myself up to the All that is waiting just for me.  In gratitude to my angels coming in the guise of Tyler Perry and Brave Girls Club this morning for helping me to rescue myself from drowning in a self-imposed pool of shallow water.