Indulging myself in rest

This morning I indulged myself by staying in bed even though I have so many things to do today. Some many places I have to be. But I could not resist the warmth of my bed particularly since I was not flushed with hot flashes. Heavenly. I felt so comfortable that I just snuggled in.

I woke at my usual time then felt so good to know that I did not have to be anywhere until hours later so I took comfort in knowing I could just roll over and go back to sleep. And I did. For what I thought was for a few minutes.

But then I woke to the sun streaming through my windows. Birds chirping and the sounds of the day fully awake. The day had broken and started and had left me behind. Left me in that place of in between yesterday and today.  I looked at the clock and was surprised to see I had slept for another three hours. Obviously my whole being needed it so I gave myself permission to stay in bed for a few minutes more. Enjoying the fact that it was Saturday morning and I still had a few hours before I had to get a move on it.

And before I knew it one and a half hours had gone by because I had drifted into another deep sleep. I jumped up feeling totally guilty for not getting up and doing some of the things I said I was going to do like go for a walk and inhale the morning air. Like meditate and clear my rambling thoughts. Like cook breakfast for my family so no one was rushing around trying to make sure they are in the places they were meant to be.

I rushed into the shower berating myself for taking my time. For not doing what I was meant to do. Until the water started to run over me. Washing away the worry and the angst that was taking over my being. Each drop of water reminding me that sometimes we just have to indulge ourselves and listen to what our mind, bodies and souls are telling us they need. To accept that sometimes that means to just rest and do nothing. To sleep and allow our whole beings to recharge. To not worry about the things we thought we were supposed to do. Instead to just accept we are exactly where we are meant to be. Doing exactly what we are meant to be doing.

And after I showered and dressed and sat down to write this blog, I realized even more  that this morning  my meditation, my walk and cooking breakfast were all in my mind’s dream world where I escaped for a little while from the demands of my every day existence and instead remained in that place of surrender. That place where there are no worries, no regrets, no clocks. Just plain surrender and now I feel good. Rested and ready to go.

Accepting that sometimes we just have to let go and be where we are really meant to be not where we thought we should be. And just as I finished typing this piece, my Cardinal started singing good morning to me. Chirping above all the other birds so I could hear him letting me know all is well. All is good.

Happy Saturday everyone.