Feeling like a grown woman

You know there are some days that I am filled with so much joy that tears sting at the corners of my eyes. Not because of anything grand but because I realize just how fortunate I am to be the person I am. As it occurred yesterday for me when I realized with such truth and conviction that I do live a very good life. I am a very blessed person. And because I realized just how blessed I am, more blessings came my way all day yesterday. From the moment I opened my eyes and looked out the window at the beautiful place I call home to the time I sat in bed at The Charles Hotel in Cambridge later last night, I felt almost as if I had been sprinkled with pixie dust. I felt like everything I touched turned into gold right before my eyes.
A couple of times I wanted to pinch myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming. That I was fully awake. Living my dream rather than dreaming my dream. I marvelled as we drove through picturesque Cambridge at the fact that I had woken up in the morning in my own bed in Bermuda, had been to work in Bermuda but by 4.30 Boston time I was in the back seat of a taxi in a different country having a different experience than the one I started out with just hours before.
I looked out the window as we cruised by the seemingly endless Charles River where mothers were out with their children enjoying the sunshine. Fathers pushing their children on swings. Couples walking hand in hand. Friends riding bikes along the trails. Children splashing in pools and running gleefully and without worry through fountains. Lifeguards looking lazily on. Sailboats on the river. Kayakers slicing through the water. Rowers silently but purposefully gliding along the river. People in canoes all doing their thing. Almost making my heart sing. The sights and sounds of summer all around. The desolation and frigidness of the long and brutal winter the Northeast had experienced a distant memory to this picturesque summer day. Signalling no matter what we are going through, there are always better days ahead.
I thought about how much Cambridge reminded me of England with the rivers and boating and endless trails and paths.About how I felt like I was having a surreal deja vu experience because the scenery was so reminiscent of being on the Thames. How everyone was taking full advantage of the glorious sunny weather. About how beautiful weather brings us out of our doldrums if we take the time to be out doors - to explore. To observe and be at one with nature.
I sat back in the taxi allowing the feeling of gratitude to spread from my toes all the way up to my head. Closing my eyes to allow the feeling to resonate throughout my whole being. Arriving at the hotel feeling like I was on cloud nine. The time and distance between my son and me closing with every passing moment. Knowing we were getting closer to being reunited.
I ended my glorious day sitting at the Cheesecake Factory Bar on my own having a glass of sauvignon blanc and eating tuna tartare to die for toasting myself for sitting at the bar on my own without feeling self conscious and for appreciating all aspects of my life. Toasting myself for realizing the more grateful I am for my life and for being me, the more I will have to be grateful for. The more blessed, truly blessed I feel about my life and for being me, the more blessings will flow into my life. I sat at that bar, only the second time in my life I have sat at a bar all on my own feeling like a grown woman, as Beyonce likes to say. Grown and accepting of who I am for where I am with gratitude and grace. So blessed to be me. Grown, worldly and grateful. As I said yesterday, like the butterfly who discovers she is no longer in a cocoon but now has wings and can fly. So have I and so am I no longer in a cocoon. Spreading my wings and flying. What a wonderful feeling.
In just a few hours, my son and I will be reunited.  Namaste.