Yesterday my husband and I did something beautiful for our
anniversary. We gave each other to each other as a gift this year. Carving time
out of our busy schedules to really be present with each other. Taking a day away from life to be fully
present in each other’s life. Remembering why we fell in love with each other
all those years ago and it was a glorious day for us.
We did nothing but lock ourselves in our home and just
focused on us. Doing nothing but being together and it was lovely. No pressure
to prove ourselves to anyone. People kept asking me what we were giving each
other for our twenty first anniversary. And the more I thought about it, the
more I realised we spend so much time concentrating on the material side of
giving rather than on the spiritual and soul side of giving that we overlook
what each of really really wants from the other.
My husband and I kept asking each other what we should do to
honour our twenty one years of marriage. The year before when celebrated our twentieth, we spent a day and night away at a hotel. This time my desire was
simple. And so was my husband’s. We did not want to do the same as we did the year
before because we felt hitting twenty years was monumental. So we wanted a way
to celebrate this year that was special for us and us alone. And not the same as the year before.
During this process of trying to decide, it dawned on us
that what we really wanted was to spend quality time together as husband and
wife. To be really present with each other. To
be number one in each other’s day. We wanted more than superficial gift giving,
we wanted the pure and honest gift of each other. We wanted something more enduring and meaningful. The gift that cost nothing but is priceless.
We realized the one thing we can never
buy or be unsatisfied with is the gift of quality time together. Time spent reconnecting
and sharing love. Time spent away from the normal and escaping to the privacy
of why we are a couple in the first place. And it was truly an escape day for
my husband and me because we relaxed in the moment. Not worrying about what
happened the day before or what was going to happen the day after. We just were
with each other.
And it is a gift I highly recommend giving more and more. I
know it is a gift we will be giving to each other more and more. The gift of
us. The gift of being in each other’s presence. The gift of validation,
appreciation and love all tied up in the bow of the years we have been together.
The years we have loved each other, hated each other, challenged each other and
remained even when it was difficult to do so. Remain because we see something
in each other that is worth sustaining. And so yesterday we acknowledged the work
we put into our marriage, our family and into each other by rewarding ourselves
with the gift of each other. What gift can be any better than that?
Underneath all that we are, love is what we are seeking.
Only love. And when we take the time to acknowledge the love we have in our
lives freely every single day, we allow it to grow stronger, more enduring, more
compassionate, more patient and more kind. And in the process we grow as well. Here’s
to another 21 years of marriage – remembering always to carve out some time to be
truly present for each other. Undividedly so.
Recognising there is no greater gift than the gift of love.
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