This Monday is the hardest one of all as it is the first Monday
of the year where my family has to reemerge from our cocoon of Nirvana. Reemerge
into the real world for the first time in the New Year after two weeks of Christmas
and New Year’s celebrations. Two weeks of slacking off and relaxing. Two weeks
of no routines. Of not having to get up so early in the morning. Of not having
to do anything but what we wanted to do. Nirvana it seemed. But now it is time
to go back to reality. To snap out of my fantasy world of being a lady of leisure
to going back to life as it is. As is my reality at the present moment. For my
family to snap out of our cocoon to go back into the real world, separate but
combined.
So how am I going to face this day? Should I be sad that my
holiday is over? Our holiday is over. Should I be nervous about the start of
the New Year in earnest at work? The start of a new year for my children going
back to school and back to our hectic routines where everyone is here and
there.
Or should I turn the feeling around to a feeling of
gratitude? Of gratitude for having the two weeks to do nothing but what we
wanted to do. Of being together but separate at the same time.
I think I will allow the combination of both feelings to run
through me. The sadness of having to go back to routines, schedules, demands
and time constraints while at the same time being grateful for having had the
time to be. To just be. To refresh myself and my children to refresh themselves.
My husband went back on Thursday so this morning is not that
much of a shock to his system as it is to ours. It is such a dark and blustery morning
as well. So it feels like I am in the shadows. Not yet ready to emerge from my
state of bliss to the chaos of the real world. Not quite ready to think about
what lies ahead. But whether I am ready
or not, the time is upon me, upon us, to emerge . To embrace what is and to go
with it. To reemerge into the world to see what it has to offer me, my children
and my husband. To embrace what is with gratitude and grace.
So yes it is overwhelming to start anew. To go back into the
world looking ahead at the full New Year and wondering what it will bring. But if I take every moment as it comes without projecting beyond that then I will find
the reemergence is not as bad. Not as overwhelming. Because only then will I be
able to breathe and live as I am meant to live rather than worrying about what
I have no control over. Embracing the future that comes moment by moment rather than trying
to figure it all out, I will be able to take the steps I need to get to where I
am meant to be.
So now that I have talked myself off the ledge of despair I know
I have so much to be grateful for as I have been blessed with seeing another
day. Another start to a work New Year. As have my husband and children. And there
is no need to dismiss the trepidation that comes with the start of the new
because change always brings with it some reservations but it is how we react
to that change that makes the most difference.
I go forward today with gratitude and grace as my family
begins our routines for this New Year. Embracing the moment that we are in and keeping
myself open and receptive to the gifts and treasures of the Universe. Knowing
each moment is a blessing, a gift. And for seeing this first Monday of the New Year
where we begin anew, I am truly grateful. Namaste.
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