Wednesday, 12 September 2012

A feeling of Grace in the face of the Divine


Some days when I wake up I can feel the magic in the air. I can feel such possibility in the world. I understand that I am magic and I am possibility. There is nothing like that feeling. It is almost indescribable – almost surreal. This morning was one of those mornings.
I looked out at the sky this morning and it looked like something out of one of my childhood nursery rhymes. A sliver of a moon lying on its back. A sky full of stars twinkling just like in the story books. I almost chuckled looking at the stars twinkling away because I felt like a little girl again who was able to see twinkling stars not just balls of light. A dark black sky illuminated only by the lights of the moon and stars. Providing a dimension to the depth and wealth of possibility that exists before us every single day. And immediately my belief in possibility and magic swelled even more as I was filled with wonder and joy. To know that I am part of all that exists in this world, in this dimension was awe inspiring. And I inhaled deeply trying to capture the memory of that moment to store it for those times when I don’t believe in possibility. When I don’t believe in magic. When I can’t see the twinkling stars.
I inhaled the wonder of the amazingly beautiful and constantly changing world that I live in where from one day I could be in the midst of a storm to a day such as this morning where everything is beautiful and calm. Perfect almost. Allowing me to understand we have to experience constant changes in order for us to appreciate who we are, what we are and where we are. In order for us to understand that if everything remained the same all the time we would take ourselves and life for granted. Change is what allows us to see the possibility in ourselves and in the world around us.
Sometimes I wish I could bottle the feeling of joy, magic, and understanding I feel when I give myself the gift of time alone. When I give myself the gift of silence. When I feel shivers running through my body because I know I have tapped into something that is as close to the Divine as I can possibly get. When my whole spirit feels at peace. When I know I am here for a reason and accept that I am who I am as I am where I am.
Because I know these feelings come from a place of deep gratitude, of reverential understanding of the Divine plan, of being content with me. Sometimes I wish I could feel like this all the time but I know I can’t and I won’t because then I would not fully appreciate this feeling. So instead I am enjoying having had the opportunity to experience this euphoria and will surrender to it for as long as I can. Not worrying about when and how it will leave. Instead I am basking in its glory.  And for this feeling of Grace in the face of the Divine I am truly grateful.

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