There is no Vermont @ScandalABC

Spoiler Alert – this blog is dedicated to my addiction Scandal so indulge me for a minute as Liv and Fitz like to say. Just one minute. So here we go…

OMG! OMG ! OMG!

To all the @Gladiators out there, we all know what that means. To the nonGladiators, you missed an awesome show last night. Shonda  Rhimes and her team of writers are the best writers on the planet in my opinion. There is nothing that can top ABC’s Scandal – not even close. I can say that because I am totally biased and I don’t really watch anything else on TV because it is this show that keeps me coming back every single week to get my Scandal Fix.

Just when my interest was starting to wane. Just when my faith in where the show was going was starting to slip away, last night I was transported to a whole new level on my favourite show ABC Scandal. I am literally obsessed with this show and last night there were so many OMG moments that I lost count. OMG! OMG!OMG! No one is safe on this show. Nothing is out of bounds. My heart is still racing. Palms are still sweating and it’s the next morning already. Totally awesome show.

As I  told one of my fellow Gladiators during the intense tweeting and Facebooking session last night, my little Samsung tablet could not keep up with the pace that the tweets and posts were streaming so it kept freezing. I swear there was steam coming out of its top as it froze several times. Frustrating me to no end particularly when I felt I had something so profound to say. But then again I was so transfixed by the show that I didn’t mind not posting because I didn’t want to miss a word. How many negative can you count in that sentence. Hopefully they cancel out to mean something positive but whatever - it is Scandal after all!

I am an #Olitz fan all the way but last night I was on the fence for the first time thinking that #Olake may not be such a bad option until Liv turned her back on Jake sending him off the edge. Giving him what little nudge he needed to assume his whole Command persona and go in my opinion “Postal”. The monologue he started and sorted ended with showing that he has some deeply disturbing issues going on in his background that can make him become as cold as ice and as calculating as a fox. Remember power corrupts. And Jake is about to become so corrupted with so many scores he wants and needs to settle that it is firghtening. Chilling thought really.

And then Liv turns back to Fitz and says to him, “Let’s just stop pretending. Let’s just be here.” At first I thought she needed to add, “Be here right now in this moment. With me. You and me together.” But I guess she didn’t need to because when she grabbed his face and took command of their situation for the first time, her actions spoke louder than any words ever could.  The pain in both their faces. The kiss nearly melted my heart. Liv just brought everything back to the present moment. Insulating them from the past and the future that may never be. The reality that is them rather than the fantasy that may never happen for them. “There is no Vermont.” I nearly cried. Sealing their moment with that hungry kiss made me weak. So once again I was strongly an #Olitz fan but with #Olake not too far in the background. Quiver. Quiver.

And then just when I thought I could not be stunned anymore or there could not possibly be anything else that could be done. Jake turns up looking as fine as ever in his black turtle neck and pea jacket, as we called them back in the day, and appeared to shoot people he should not be shooting.  I mean after all isn’t he Command and doesn’t he know that he has been elevated to have people that do that sort of stuff for him. Or was he just trying to show that he is not just a pretty face but a cold and calculating murderer too so he can recruit those who never knew they were capable of being recruited into the elusive B613 into his fold. And whomever he recruited knows not to mess with him.

I don’t know but all I can say is hats off to Shonda Rhimes, her writers and the Scandal team for hurling me back into my addictive state of not being able to wait until the next episode of Scandal. How much more time until next Thursday… 6 days, 137 hours, 8220 seconds – but hey whose counting…

Bring it on @KerryWashington, @TonyGoldwyn, @ScottKFoley, @ ShondaRhimes, @ScandalABC.  Can’t wait to see what happens next. Next Thursday can’t come fast enough…

An invaluable lesson from Tony Goldwyn

The strangest thing happened to me last night. So strange that I had to take some time to process what happened because of how and where it happened. Particularly since it came from a source I least expected but a lesson I was meant to receive and learn came through loud and clear. A lesson that is forcing me to come out of the closet about one of my guilty pleasures. Forcing me to come out of the closet about my fear of publicly speaking about my writing.

I am so addicted to ABC’s Scandal that I watch something about it every single day. So much so that my children and husband now roll their eyes up in their heads when they walk past my computer and see I am watching yet another thing about Scandal. Like a true addict,  I am so embarrassed to be watching another interview with Kerry Washington, Tony Goldwyn or Shonda Rhimes that when one of my family members walk by, I quickly switch the screens so I don’t have to see the look of disgust on their faces! Crazy that I came into this whole Scandal thing so late but now I am so hooked I can’t seem to get enough of it. But I regress.

The strange thing happened to me was while watching an interview with Tony Goldwyn on Spreecast from 2013 on YouTube ( an amazing invention by the way - You Tube that is). Tony said something that struck a chord so deep within me that I felt like he had been delivered to me at the moment for a reason. An angel least expected.

In response to a question posed by Tangela, who is probably the greatest fan of Scandal, about making it without a name, Tony told her that having talent is only a small percentage of making it, that 10% of success comes from inspiration while 90% of it comes from perspiration. He described how watching an actor from Breaking Bad do his job with an intense passion proved to him that anybody can make their dreams come true.  But first we have to believe in our own dreams and work hard to make them happen. To not be afraid to tell people about them. To not be afraid to talk about them all the time. To not be afraid to speak into existence what we most desire and dream about. And then not be afraid to do the work to make our dreams happen.

A light bulb went off in my head when I heard his words. I am very passionate about writing and have been since I can remember but I allowed others to diminish my passion by accepting them telling me everyone wants to be a writer and anyone can write. By believing them when they questioned why I thought I was more special than anyone else who is aspiring to be a writer. So for years, including now, I have hidden my writing. Kept it almost as if it is a dirty little secret that only certain people are allowed to know. Almost as if I am too ashamed to expose this writing thing that gets me up in the morning. That sets the tone for the day.

I realized without a doubt that I have hidden that aspect of myself because it does not fit the persona that I project every single day. That controlled woman who goes out and gets things done because when I write I have no control over what comes out of me. In order to write authentically, I am forced to let go and let be. To allow the words to come from a place that I don’t even know where the place is. Nor do I understand.

I also realized I don’t have personal photos attached to my blog , instead I have an image of a spiritual woman because at least then I can still hide behind her image rather than showing who I am for what I am. Hearing Tony Goldwyn speak last night made me realize why I was led to interviews because through him I was being led to a truth about myself.  The truth is if writing is my dream, I have to claim it for what it is, go with the flow and speak it to anyone who will listen rather than being afraid of who will discover what I write and whether my readers will like what I write.

Writing is a very personal thing because it comes from places deep within. Places where there are no right or wrong. No rhyme or reason. Only what is meant to be. And it is my passion. My gift. And I am owning it. Claiming it for what it is and what it makes me.

So today world look out because I’m coming out. I want the world to know. Got to let it show. I am a writer and I am proud of it. Two guilty pleasures colliding to help me to understand I am my writing and my writing is me.

Confessions of an unexpected #Gladiator

I have a problem and the only way I think I will be able to overcome it, is to confess it. So I am going out on a limb and confessing to the fact that I am totally and utterly addicted to #ABC’s Scandal. And more so to the love affair between #Olivia and #Fitz or #Olitz as they are called. Even writing their names sends tingles up and down my spine. How can this be?

I only became a #Gladiator in December of 2013 as I am not a television watcher in general but I was prepping for a routine procedure that I had to have – those ones that become mandatory when you reach 50! And needed something to help me to get through the process. Everyone, including people I consider to be level headed and intelligent, was talking about this show. This #Scandal and its salacious affairs, twists and turns and its plentiful OMG moments. And when I heard what the storyline was, I thought there was no way I would even enjoy it – after all I have been married for 21 years nearly 22 so why would I want to watch the story of an illicit affair?

But I remember seeing an article about #KerryWashington and #TonyGoldwyn while I was travelling somewhere and remembered the energy that was clearly evident between them – the chemistry – that certain je ne sais quoi – and decided I would give it a go.  So I bought the Season 1 DVD fully expecting to not really enjoy it but to be entertained by it. Never expecting from the first show to be hooked – a #Popehead, through and through. There was no turning back after the first viewing because after each episode I needed to know more. Understand more. See more. There was this connection that would not let me go.

The way @Fitz looks at @Olivia is the way every woman wants her man to look at her. So listen up men, take a page out of Fitz’s book. And then just when I thought I could take no more, the show ended. Season finale until February 27. Leaving me breathless, anxious and going through some serious withdrawal symptoms. So what does a professional, happily married woman, mother of two children and usually highly spiritual woman do to get over her addiction? She goes back and watches the whole series again. This time hooking her husband as well. And then when they finish the series together, she goes back and watches it again. This time under the guise of ironing the clothes that have been piled up for ages in the ironing basket – any legitimate excuse will do to help her through her addiction.

To #ShondaRhimes and #Betsy Beers, I don’t know how you managed to pull together such a wonderful collection of writers, actors and smouldering hot energy between #Fitz and #Olivia but whatever you are doing, keep it up. I am hooked. Totally and utterly. Their ability to communicate without words. The clever way in which the plot of the story, the urgency of the characters slows down when #Fitz and #Olivia are in the room nearly gives me a heart attack.

Like Huck and his Scotch addiction, I am now joining #Scandaholics and chugging back gallons of the smoothest Sancerre – of course in the most delicate crystal wine glass I can find – as a lady never drinks from the bottle - as I watch the art you are portraying – there is no right or wrong, black or white, life is messy, complicated and sometimes we end up on paths we never thought we would take. Not one of us is perfect and sometimes we need to be vulnerable and flawed so that we can know life and love in ways we never dreamed possible. So that we can drown in the fantasy that is reality. Brilliant.

Thanks for the ride #Scandal, #Olitz, #ShondaRhimes. Can’t wait for February 27 – how many more days are left - who would have thought? But now that I have confessed hopefully I can go back to having a normal life again – but if not there are always the Season DVDs, YouTube and whatever else I can get my hands on for my #Scandal fix….Scandalous.