We are the sum of the energies we project

You know life has a funny way of bringing us exactly what we ask for. Yearn for and desire. Often not when we expect it. Sometimes it can take years before the thing we thought we wanted the most comes to us. Usually at a time when we have forgotten that we sent that desire or wish out into the Universe. It lands gently at our feet. Wrapped beautifully for us to receive.

When it is something grand or something that will benefit us immensely, every step, every choice we make in life is leading us to that desire we asked for. Every opportunity that comes our way, even though we may end up in the wilderness from that choice, is preparing us for the mother lode we always knew we were capable of achieving.

What we must ask ourselves every single day is,  is the thing we desire the most really something we will be prepared to handle when it lands at our feet? Will we be strong enough to take the gift that has comes to us when we least expect it. Or after we have given up on it because we thought it would never come.

Life has a funny way of directing our feet, our thoughts, and our actions on the path that will take us to our ultimate desires. What we must learn to do is to channel our thoughts in the way that we really want to go rather than halfheartedly on what other people are doing. Because that is when we get lost.

When we become so focused on other people’s lives, our energy goes to them and we miss the cues of our own lives.

People who manifest their desires and appear lucky are not lucky at all. They just focus on doing what is good and right for them and they also know that in order for them to receive they have to be willing to give. And when they give they are giving from a place of love without expectation of receiving anything in return but knowing that every action leads to an equal and opposite reaction.

They put their desires out into the Universe then they keep stepping, keep moving to the rhythm of life, staying in the flow so the flow always directs them when the time is right. Delivers to them their deepest desires because they have become givers of life rather than takers of life.

When we learn gossiping about others, finding fault with others takes away from our own ability to change our lives because we are so busy living other people’s lives, we will find our lives change drastically because we learn there is always something inherently good in everyone. We also  learn sometimes it’s better to leave their negative energy alone and focus on the good energy that will help to move us into the space of Divine possibility and abundance.

When we focus on listening to our inner voice and answering its call, all roads lead to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow even when we have to move through dense and heavy rain. After the rains there is always a rainbow and that’s what people who manifest their dreams always know. That sometimes they will get drenched in the downpours of life but if they have faith and trust in the Universe they will have the wherewithal to understand everything that comes their way is necessary for them to get to where they need to go. Sometimes instantly. Other times after slogging through pouring rain and the wilderness for a long time but ultimately we always get what our deepest desires really are.

With the lesson being, we always get what we ask for; think about, because we are a sum of the energies that we project. Question then becomes what is the energy I am projecting? Because our energy is who we are and what we are capable of manifesting. No one else’s. Namaste.

The most annoying people are our greatest teachers

When we are willing to accept every person and event in our lives as lessons to teach us  about ourselves, we become so much more receptive and grateful for them. They may not be what we want to remain in our lives and that is what they came to teach us. To highlight to us the limits and boundaries we must establish in our lives. The lines we must draw in the sand about the behaviours we are willing to accept. The compassion to know how to treat others so we will not inflict the same pain on others.

Every person has a limit to what she can and cannot take. A limit to the amount of intrusion he is willing to allow in her lives. Once that has been crossed what ends up happening is resentment. We resent the person for the intrusion. We resent their mere presence. But the only person we should be resenting is ourselves because we allowed them to cross that boundary and we continue to allow them to cross that boundary.

The most annoying people are our greatest teachers because they are the ones who are asking us to dig deep about an aspect about ourselves we have chosen to suppress, ignore, or pretend does not exist so we resent them rather than express gratitude for their presence. When we express gratitude for their presence within ourselves, the message from them becomes loud and clear. It becomes one of either having to change something about ourselves or becomes one of moving away.

But if we just chose to ignore the annoyance without learning from it, we will encounter the same problem over and over again just in different places and from different faces. We cannot run from our shadow selves no matter how elusive or clever we think we may be. Our shadow selves are always with us. Always there trying to overpower the light within us all. Always there trying to help us to become who we asked to come here to be. The balance between the light and the dark.

And when we get that message we see why that annoying person or event crossed our path – to teach us about who we are or who we are not.

With gratitude for every person and event that have occurred in my life and for all those people and events that will cross my path because I know they are there because I attracted them into my life by the energy I am projecting. So it is up to me to determine what I am meant to learn so their presence can either remain or be let go with gratitude and grace. With love and respect. Honour and peace. Recognising them as a gift from the Universe to help me to be more me. And not what people want me to be.

A hard lesson to learn sometimes particularly when we have to let go but a lesson worth it in the end. Especially when we are able to see through the annoyance to the treasure waiting for us to own as our own.

A lesson from the stars this morning

This morning I felt compelled to go to the window. To look outside. To feel the presence of the outside. The world. The possibility. As a matter of fact this whole week has been that way for me. The dawn of a new day has been beckoning me . Asking me to listen to the silence of the new day. Of the new beginning. To hear in the silence all that I need to hear. To drink in with my eyes the presence of new beginnings. Awakenings occurring every single day.

So this morning I went to the window and looked out and at first all I saw were heavy clouds. Thick white clouds in the otherwise dark sky. I thought to myself another day of rain, wind and darkness. No stars. No light. Just darkness. Rain and wind again. Bah  hum bug was the mood I was about to put myself in.

And just as I was starting to feel an oppression coming on about the weather, when I looked closer, I saw them there, not as bright as usual but there nonetheless, the stars hidden in plain sight. Waiting for me to get beyond the expectation I had that it was another dark and gloomy morning because I had woken up to pouring rain and high winds.

The stars suddenly appearing before my eyes let me know they were always there but I was too busy seeing what I wanted to see rather than what was there and available for me to see. Teaching me that too often we do that in life as well. We go out into the world armed with our expectations and foregone conclusions that we do not see the opportunity the abundance, the light right there in front of us. Waiting for us to discover them. Waiting for us to see what has been hidden in plain sight for us all along. Asking us to stop and to be aware of all that is available to us and to be grateful for its existence.

As I stood and looked at the stars I felt the magic of that moment spreading through my whole being. The fullness of all that is, was and ever will be filling me with great hope and possibility to know I am a part of the whole. I am all that I wish to be when I stop and go within to listen to the all-knowing voice of mine that will never lead me astray unless I fail to take heed or refuse to listen.

I gloried in the light of the morning stars even though they were not as bright nor as luminous as they normally are because what they showed me is that there is always light, always a way even in our darkest hour as long as we are willing to let go of our expectations and surrender to the moment we are in. Surrender fully and totally to allow us to see what has always been there waiting for us all along. The truth and the light showing us the way to our glory and  salvation.

And for the morning stars, hidden in plain sight, awakening me to the spirit that resides in me and in us all, I am truly grateful. The source of our abundance, possibility and light is always there for us even when we think it is not. It is. Always. Nasmaste.

Happy Birthday to my sister friend woman and big sister

Today my sister turns 64! 64 years old. My eldest sister. Making me think about the years that have flown by. The bridges we have crossed as sisters. The matriarch of my family, my direct family. How can she be 64 already? That means we are mature women, nearing the end of our life cycle. The Krone stage as it used to be called. Meaning in 14 years I will be her age and she in her late 70s. Wow amazing how quickly the cycles of life come and go.

As I look back over time, I think of the varying stages of our relationship. In my early years how I used to admire her and wanted to be just like her. She and my older sister just seemed so cool. They had the best clothes. They drove fancy cars. Had great parties. Lots of cool friends. They seemed like women of the world to my small girlhood world. Because they were so much older than me, I always had stars in my eyes when I looked at them and their lives.

Then our mother died and my sister stepped in as there was no one else for us. The first one on the scene when my dad realized my mom was in trouble. The one who remained when she was gone. Giving up her life so we could have one. She tried her best to hold us together. Always encouraged me to be the best I could be just by being there and rewarding me with trips whenever I placed in the top three at school. Little did she know just how much of an effect she had on my life by showing me that she was interested in me.

Little did I know at the time just how much of an influence she was having on my life. By taking me with her. Opening my eyes to the wider world. Giving me wings to see there was much more beyond the tiny confines of my 21 mile square island home. Waiting just for me. Allowing me to understand there was really a big wide world out there beyond the ocean’s horizon that was waiting for me. Beckoning me. Calling my name.

I think of those teenage years when I was dark and moody and felt like Cinderella and how truly my sister felt like my fairy godmother on many occasions by all that she gave to me even when she could no longer bear to be in our same household, she never lost touch with me. Always coming back for me. To rescue me from the doldrums I could have easily fallen into and letting me know there was so much more for me.

And now we are adults. Sister friend women who though we are very different share a very special bond that holds us together regardless of where our life paths may take us. She has walked this earth for 64 years and in those years has been a support for many people. Has a heart of gold even though she maintains a tough exterior, I know she would do and give anyone anything even if it means she would have to go without herself. That’s just the kind of woman she is and today I acknowledge my big sister for helping to mold me into the woman I am today. Without her I would not have been able to see beyond the confines of my physical trappings. I would not have been able to see the vastness of the world that existed just for me.

By investing in my future, my sister helped me to know in order for a child to flourish, we must invest in his future to allow her to see the vastness of the world that awaits him as I do for my children now. Even if it means I have to do without as did she. My sister taught me an invaluable lesson, the cycles of life continue as we give back to make way for the future.

So I am wishing my big sister, Patricia Butterfield, the best birthday wishes today with love and gratitude, honour and respect. Namaste my sister.

True and enduring love is the most testing love

Relationships require work. They test us. Sometimes break us.  But in most cases help to make us. Through long and committed relationships, we learn so much more about ourselves – what we can and cannot take. What makes us thrive and what makes us want to run away.

True and honest relationships are lasting relationships because they ask us to dig deep. To share unconditionally. To open to our most vulnerable sides in order for us and our relationships to flourish and to grow.

Too often we become mired in self that we do not see the benefit of the people we have allowed into our innermost circles. People that are here as gifts to help balance us and to help us to get through the toughest times in our lives just by being there.

There are also some relationships that are not meant to last and we cannot beat ourselves up for letting them go because they were only meant to last for a season. To teach us something about ourselves. And once we get the lesson we are free to move on with love and light. Not with malice or mal-intent. If we are harbouring any of those feelings, we have not learnt the lesson we were meant to learn and that lesson will continue to follow us – different faces but same issue – until we get the lesson.

Marriages or long lasting committed relationships are the most challenging because we have to be ourselves at some point in our relationship and that means letting down our guards. Letting down the guise we put up for the rest of the world and being who we truly are. It is only for so long that we can pretend that everything is okay. That we are okay. But eventually we have to be who we are and be willing to share that part of ourselves with our partners. And they with us as well.

When we are willing to be who we are honestly and truly, we find our relationships are the most wonderful gift we can be given from the universe because we are allowed to relax. To take off the armour and to be accepted for who we are – imperfect and flawed human beings trying to grow. Learning to love and to forgive through our everyday life existence. Not the extraordinary but the ordinary.

And it is for these reasons that we must show gratitude to our partners as much as we can and not take them for granted because their very presence helps us to be who we are and what we are every single day.

Enduring relationships require work. Require patience. Require love and forgiveness. But they are worth it in the end because they help to ground us to the reality of who we are and what we came here to learn. Our life partners are reflections of who we are. Mirrors of our souls. Sent to show us our deepest and darkest selves. Our shadow selves. Teaching us that often what we dislike about them is what we dislike about ourselves. And if we want that relationship to flourish we must own our dislike and magically  the resentment disappears.

And when we let go and surrender to our relationship, we find we see the world through a whole different lens  - one of love and light, peace and forgiveness, and full of abundance and grace because we become beacons of love and light radiating out for the rest of the world to share in. There is nothing more liberating and satisfying than enduring love, true and unconditional love because that love begins with us and us alone. We cannot love another fully unless we learn to love ourselves first. 

In Reverence to Remembrance Day

Today is Remembrance Day. The day when many reflect on those lost in the war. 11.11. Binary number which represents the base. And a prime number divisible by nothing but itself.

I have decided to not only reflect on those lost in the war but to reflect on all those who have walked before me and opened the door for me to be where I am today. Those who have carried the burden of race, injustice, inequality and chose to make the way better for each generation that follows. Allowing us presently on this earth to have an easier time than the generation before. It is with gratitude that I think of my ancestors, fore bearers and original inhabitants of this earth who had the foresight to do what they did in order for us to be as we are today.

I think of my mother and all that she sacrificed so that I can be the woman I am today. Even though her life was shorter than mine, she did all she could to enable me to have the tools I have today.

I recently heard on the BBC that the first two years of a child’s life determine whether he or she will be an optimist or pessimist. And it all depends on the nurturing our children receive during those first two years as to whether they will view the world from an optimistic perspective or pessimistic perspective. And I believe those words to be true particularly since I managed to come through a very dark period in my life and recognize it now as a gift from the Universe to give me wings to fly. That ability to turn a negative into a positive had to have come from somewhere and I always pondered where. The explanation about the nurturing and love of a mother in the first two years of a child’s life is so important to me. It literally shapes our futures. So I am grateful to my mother for having given me two years of love when my life first began.

And now I understand why it was so important for me to spend the early years of my children’s lives with them because there was something imprinted on my brain about the need to nurture and love them for their first few years. I obviously carried that love with me subconsciously and wanted to pass that gift on to my children to help them build a foundation of love, trust and security. Giving them the ability to go out into the world as giving citizens.

Today is Remembrance Day – a day to remember those who we have lost. Those who we have loved. Those who died for us. Those that will remain in our hearts and souls forever because we are a part of them as they are a part of us.

Remembrance day is a virtuous and holy day, however you may interpret that phrase, to allow us to remember we are all here in passing and it is up to us to truly live and to leave behind a legacy we can be proud of. To help and share rather than to destroy and destruct. Life goes on infinitely through the rebirth of nature every single day. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. From the womb of Mother Earth we come and through her body we will go.

In reverence to Remembrance Day with gratitude and love. Namaste.

Setting personal boundaries is an honour to ourselves

Setting boundaries in our lives can be very challenging particularly when there are people that are very close to us who believe we always have something to give. We feel obligated to help them knowing that in helping them, we are taking from ourselves at times. Some people in our lives feel like we are always supposed to be there no matter what they say or do to us or expect for us to give regardless of what we are experiencing or going through.

There are some who make assumptions about the lives of others based on the external trappings they see but they have no idea what is really going on in people’s lives behind closed doors. Behind the physical trappings.

Sometimes there is just nothing more to give and when we realize there isn't,  we go to the extreme and close ourselves off from people to protect ourselves from their demands. From their desires. Because we need space. We need time to understand who we are under the guise we have put forward to the outside world.

Even the strongest people can be weak at times and sometimes they need comfort and support too but when the world thinks the strong ones are always strong or always have something to give, they keep demanding. Keep requesting. Keep asking.

But for all of us, even those who are strong, what we must establish are personal boundaries. Fences in our own minds about how much we can give before we become depleted. Before we turn our backs and move away because we cannot take any more of the drama or energy depletion that is happening to us. That we have allowed to happen to us because we failed to establish boundaries in the first place.

So it is up to us to establish boundaries early on. To be honest about what we can and cannot give. What we can and cannot take. That way no one can push beyond those boundaries unless we allow them to. Unless we give them permission.

Sometimes this boundary setting can be very difficult because when we are giving people, as I am most of the time, we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. We don’t want to seem like we are rejecting anyone. Or being selfish. But at the end of the day if we keep giving, we  will end up being the ones who are feeling the most rejected because we will be rejecting what we truly feel deep down inside.

I am so grateful for my meditation this morning because I woke up feeling like I am constantly being asked to give. Constantly being asked to be the strong one. Constantly providing for everyone else. And I was struggling with the pressure. With the expectations of everyone else. And then I came to Day 6 of the Gratitude meditation to find the answer given to me at the right time by the Universe,  “Saying “no” can be a most loving gesture that insures a harmonious  future in any relationship.  When we honour what is most important to us, we honour others as well.”

It is okay,and more importantly, it is necessary to set boundaries in our relationships, whatever they may be, to allow for our relationships to flourish and not to be one-sided. Depleting and exhausting.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart Universe for answering my prayer, my call this morning, I am truly grateful. Because I know in setting personal boundaries I am honouring the place in me as I am honouring the place in others. Namaste.